Her name as I grew up was "Sis", the older sister among my aunts and uncles.
She stayed "older sister", mentor, pattern setter, all her life. And she acted out what she taught.
My favorite story happened during the rapid growth phase of Lamar U. in Beaumont. On her way to class, arms full of papers, walking through an area where a Ditch-Witch had cut several channels in the grass along the sidewalk, she got bumped to her left by a student in a hurry. There was, of course, a channel cut along the side walk to her left side.
After two steps it was clear she was falling to the left! Grey hair in a bun, sensible shoes, very professorial, arms full of papers, the angle of the lean made things clear. She was falling. Ah, but with a flex of the left leg, and a strong extension pushing off, a dip of the shoulder, and a quick twist, Sis rolled across her back and shoulders, arms clutched around the papers, completed the roll shifting balance to her feet, and stood in the grass.
There was applause!
And what did she say? "Oh, that's nothing, really. I've taught that move to young actors for the last 40 years. Anyone could do it. But thank you for the applause."
Later that year, I was privileged to go along for the Speech Department Christmas party. Good grief, there were professors tripping over doorways, missing the "sit down" on chairs, stumbling down the stairs! Laughter everywhere. As an exhibition for a 19-year-old college student, it was a game-changer!
What's possible in life? Almost anything you want to prepare for! Want to be a highly skilled surgeon, design a flight simulator, create breakthrough moments in some field that fascinates you? Well! Prepare for it! A rule of thumb for "mastery" in many fields is like that for music: Invest 10,000 hours to master your target. Violin or dentistry, acting or surgery, there is an investment that might mean starting in the teen years and last until you're 30 or more. Invest 10,000 hours in "goofing off" and you KNOW what you get.
What's possible? A lot more than some folks think, for sure.
That's what the mentor was all about!
Thanks, Sis.
Sunday, February 24, 2013
Saturday, February 23, 2013
The Power of Purpose
I've been reading a bit about Viktor Frankl this week, and about purpose, and the superiority of purpose over happiness. Other people's purpose can sometimes inspire us in ways that surprise them and us.
My aunt taught. She loved teaching speech and English. She loved speech therapy, and did a bit of it. She loved theater, and got a Masters in theater and costume design.
As she approached her 50th birthday, she started working on adding speech therapy to the curriculum at the college where she taught speech and story-telling. Bit by bit, she got others enthused about the college being able to offer a clinical speech therapy program, and a degree in the subject. Year after year, she worked with accrediting agencies, and with the administration of the college (by this time called a University), until she could see the program beginning to happen.
She could also see that, in developing higher criteria for education in speech therapy, she was no longer qualified to actually teach in the program. But, she kept working through the process, the first courses were added to the curriculum, the subject was offered as a major, and a department was funded.
When she came to her retirement, the department had its own building, professors and assistants were on staff, and the first graduates received diplomas.
She was delighted! Did she ever teach? No. Was she ever named or recognized as being integral to the program? No. Was she happy? Yes, and in a particular way. There is a kind of happiness that, as Frankl said it, ENSUES when purpose is fulfilled. It is a kind of happiness that you can't PURSUE, hoping to find a particular feeling. It is a kind of happiness that almost finds us when we are looking the other way, pouring ourselves into purpose that is worth the effort. And it is the best kind, you know.
My aunt taught. She loved teaching speech and English. She loved speech therapy, and did a bit of it. She loved theater, and got a Masters in theater and costume design.
As she approached her 50th birthday, she started working on adding speech therapy to the curriculum at the college where she taught speech and story-telling. Bit by bit, she got others enthused about the college being able to offer a clinical speech therapy program, and a degree in the subject. Year after year, she worked with accrediting agencies, and with the administration of the college (by this time called a University), until she could see the program beginning to happen.
She could also see that, in developing higher criteria for education in speech therapy, she was no longer qualified to actually teach in the program. But, she kept working through the process, the first courses were added to the curriculum, the subject was offered as a major, and a department was funded.
When she came to her retirement, the department had its own building, professors and assistants were on staff, and the first graduates received diplomas.
She was delighted! Did she ever teach? No. Was she ever named or recognized as being integral to the program? No. Was she happy? Yes, and in a particular way. There is a kind of happiness that, as Frankl said it, ENSUES when purpose is fulfilled. It is a kind of happiness that you can't PURSUE, hoping to find a particular feeling. It is a kind of happiness that almost finds us when we are looking the other way, pouring ourselves into purpose that is worth the effort. And it is the best kind, you know.
Monday, February 18, 2013
Against False Fears
It's been a while since I did a blog; medical issues have come to our house, resolving now, and life is better and lighter!
I've been thinking about the very verbal folks these days working on (and building up) fear. Fear about the economy, fear of the government, fear of secret and hidden forces that are a clear and present danger to simple folks such as us living in East Texas. There's just a lot of it.
I remember when I was a youth, there was a huge amount of fear being "stoked" by Senator Joseph McCarthy and other, the anticommunist crusaders who saw communists and communist-sympathizers everywhere. They must be exposed. They must be black-listed, not allowed on stage or screen or in newspapers. Huge hearings in Washington, recruiting people to turn other people in.
There was an uncle who was totally into "the cause". He was a "true" patriot. My Dad was NOT into the cause. I asked him one day why not? "Well, most of the charges being made are false, in the first place. In the second place, they are being used to attract attention and further the political careers of a few folks. And, in the third place, communism, especially as practiced in the Soviet Union, is so flawed a system that it will fall of its own weight!"
Well, McCarthy was totally discredited, a major assistant, Richard Nixon, lasted a bit longer and went higher, only to collapse in intrigue and dishonesty. And the Soviet Union? It collapsed, from the inside, because it was a totally unworkable system of governance.
Every government that lasts rules with the consent of the governed! No consent: no durability. We've forgotten that basic political truth, it seems. Truth works. Wild charges, re-writing the Constitution to favor a political viewpoint, obstuctionism, and the apparent chorus of Chicken Little, all roll along. But TRUTH continues to win arguments.
I remember Dad coming home from the office one day, after having met with a very influential leader of the city who was paranoid about communists. They managed a pleasant conversation. Dad said the only reason it stayed pleasant was because the man across the desk had no idea of the contents of the books on my Dad's shelf! Paranoid, uneducated in either history or politics, emotionally over the top, the visitor never stopped talking! But he followed Senator McCarthy without question. And his day passed, and the emotions are largely forgotten.
Learning history BEFORE pronouncing judgement on leaders or on the Constitution is really a pretty good idea. But human nature forgets that. When we choose to listen to whoever talks at the greatest volume, we can be both fooled and frightened. Unfortunately, some folks try to defend the Constitution without reading it.
The next time someone angrily tells you what the Constitution MEANS, don't argue, just go and read the relevant part. Maybe they just don't know, after all, and it is just the paranoia speaking.
We can do better, you know.
I've been thinking about the very verbal folks these days working on (and building up) fear. Fear about the economy, fear of the government, fear of secret and hidden forces that are a clear and present danger to simple folks such as us living in East Texas. There's just a lot of it.
I remember when I was a youth, there was a huge amount of fear being "stoked" by Senator Joseph McCarthy and other, the anticommunist crusaders who saw communists and communist-sympathizers everywhere. They must be exposed. They must be black-listed, not allowed on stage or screen or in newspapers. Huge hearings in Washington, recruiting people to turn other people in.
There was an uncle who was totally into "the cause". He was a "true" patriot. My Dad was NOT into the cause. I asked him one day why not? "Well, most of the charges being made are false, in the first place. In the second place, they are being used to attract attention and further the political careers of a few folks. And, in the third place, communism, especially as practiced in the Soviet Union, is so flawed a system that it will fall of its own weight!"
Well, McCarthy was totally discredited, a major assistant, Richard Nixon, lasted a bit longer and went higher, only to collapse in intrigue and dishonesty. And the Soviet Union? It collapsed, from the inside, because it was a totally unworkable system of governance.
Every government that lasts rules with the consent of the governed! No consent: no durability. We've forgotten that basic political truth, it seems. Truth works. Wild charges, re-writing the Constitution to favor a political viewpoint, obstuctionism, and the apparent chorus of Chicken Little, all roll along. But TRUTH continues to win arguments.
I remember Dad coming home from the office one day, after having met with a very influential leader of the city who was paranoid about communists. They managed a pleasant conversation. Dad said the only reason it stayed pleasant was because the man across the desk had no idea of the contents of the books on my Dad's shelf! Paranoid, uneducated in either history or politics, emotionally over the top, the visitor never stopped talking! But he followed Senator McCarthy without question. And his day passed, and the emotions are largely forgotten.
Learning history BEFORE pronouncing judgement on leaders or on the Constitution is really a pretty good idea. But human nature forgets that. When we choose to listen to whoever talks at the greatest volume, we can be both fooled and frightened. Unfortunately, some folks try to defend the Constitution without reading it.
The next time someone angrily tells you what the Constitution MEANS, don't argue, just go and read the relevant part. Maybe they just don't know, after all, and it is just the paranoia speaking.
We can do better, you know.
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